One day, as I set out for the morning, my backpack felt much lighter, practically weightless. Normally, it carries a laptop, a notebook, my meditation beads, some spiritual books to distribute to those looking for a higher taste in life, and a lovingly prepared lunch, offered first to Krishna. But on this day, there was no food in it.
On the eleventh (it can vary some times) day of every fortnight, Ekadashi, those who wish to make rapid spiritual progress observe a fast. The specific standard of the fast depends on many factors, but in my case, I am blessed that I do not need to eat on that day. It took a long time to get there, and the process was gradual, but it has been well worth it. I don’t take any credit for this, because He who creates the hunger that appears unbearable on other days simply chooses to free me from it on Ekadashi. This is so we can focus on something higher.
People sometimes fast for different reasons. But all the purposes of fasting are served when we fast for spiritual purposes, just as all purposes of a small well are served by a gigantic fresh water lake.
On Ekadashi days, I do drink water, which is a great blessing. Water cleanses in so many ways. One can appreciate the beautiful taste of water more when one is fasting from food.
रसोऽहमप्सु कौन्तेय
O son of Kuntī, I am the taste of water
As a spirit soul full of eternity, knowledge and bliss, it is a humbling paradox that we are saddled with a body that “needs” to eat, sleep, and seek recreation. Because we are presently in the material world, everyone must work for their sustenance. Even the powerful “king of the jungle”, the lion cannot simply lie down, go to sleep, and expect food to enter its mouth.
न हि सुप्तस्य सिंहस्य प्रवि-शन्ति मुखे मृगाः
Animals don’t enter into the mouth of a sleeping lion
The weight of a meal
Eating is a requirement to keep the body alive, so we spend a vast amount of time working and making all the necessary arrangements. Yet, even when we pay for our food, we aren’t paying the full price of food. In this material world, some other living entity must die so that we may live. Whether it is a grain of rice, a bean, a potato, or a nut, a life is given so that I can survive. Because of this, I am careful to honor the life of these living entities by offering them in sacred sacrifice to Krishna.
In this sense, food is “heavy” in many ways, not just by its weight in a bag or its economic price, but by the karmic reactions attached to it.
Generally, the material world is a place where the philosophy is “you die so I can live”. Those who wish to advance spiritually abstain from meat.
अहस्तानि सहस्तानामपदानि चतुष्पदाम् ।
फल्गूनि तत्र महतां जीवो जीवस्य जीवनम् ॥ ४७ ॥ahastāni sahastānām
apadāni catuṣ-padām
phalgūni tatra mahatāṁ
jīvo jīvasya jīvanamThose who are devoid of hands are prey for those who have hands; those devoid of legs are prey for the four-legged. The weak are the subsistence of the strong, and the general rule holds that one living being is food for another.
The Hidden Costs
I reflected in quiet wonder, tracing the journey of a single morsel of food back to its source. We easily settle our debts with the farmer, the trader, and the storekeeper, the visible hands that bring food to our table. But what of the invisible ones? Mother Earth charges no rent for her soil; the sun sends no invoice for his light and warmth, the clouds ask for no payment for the rain. Our currency reaches the middlemen, but it never reaches the Source. Do we not owe a deeper debt to the ones who give everything for nothing in return?
Watering the Root
The only way to truly benefit all these contributors is to offer the food back to God. As God says:
यज्ञशिष्टाशिनः सन्तो मुच्यन्ते सर्वकिल्बिषै ।
भुञ्जते ते त्वघं पापा ये पचन्त्यात्मकारणात् ॥ १३ ॥yajña-śiṣṭāśinaḥ santo
mucyante sarva-kilbiṣaiḥ
bhuñjate te tv aghaṁ pāpā
ye pacanty ātma-kāraṇātSynonymsThe devotees of the Lord are released from all kinds of sins because they eat food which is offered first for sacrifice. Others, who prepare food for personal sense enjoyment, verily eat only sin.
Anyone who does not offer their food to God is caught in a cycle of debt. It is a matter of “an eye for an eye.” If I eat a grain of rice selfishly, I incur the karmic reaction of becoming a grain of rice myself, to be eaten by that same soul in another form. Time separates me from the inevitable consequences of my actions, but the consequence is unavoidable. As sure as death.
This is because when we water the root of the tree, all the branches, twigs, and leaves automatically get watered.
यथा तरोर्मूलनिषेचनेन
तृप्यन्ति तत्स्कन्धभुजोपशाखा: ।
प्राणोपहाराच्च यथेन्द्रियाणां
तथैव सर्वार्हणमच्युतेज्या ॥ १४ ॥yathā taror mūla-niṣecanena
tṛpyanti tat-skandha-bhujopaśākhāḥ
prāṇopahārāc ca yathendriyāṇāṁ
tathaiva sarvārhaṇam acyutejyāAs pouring water on the root of a tree energizes the trunk, branches, twigs and everything else, and as supplying food to the stomach enlivens the senses and limbs of the body, simply worshiping the Supreme Personality of Godhead through devotional service automatically satisfies the demigods, who are parts of that Supreme Personality.
Do you know how heavy your food is?
Can you afford the price of your food?
Can you carry it’s weight?
That Ekadashi was a great day, packed with a lot of extra time and energy. We often have no idea how much work it actually takes just to procure, eat, and digest all that food. The very next day, of course, my bag was heavy again. But having reflected on the cost, I carried it with a renewed sense of gratitude and responsibility.
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